I watched an interview with a woman who had lived in agonizing emotional pain for a decade related to a trauma that had taken place in her family. She longed for life to return to normal. In her efforts to make this happen she destroyed her marriage and her purpose in life. She said she finally realized what all her vain attempts for ‘life to be the way it used to be’ had cost her, and was moving on with her life. The interviewer asked, “Does this mean you are back to normal?” Without hesitation, “No, I’ve started a new normal.”
With some tragedies, life will never return to what we once labeled as normal. When a loved one dies, it becomes impossible to return to life as it was with that individual. The last stage of grief is acceptance. This is the point people must start a new normal. However, I know individuals who refuse anything new and live a life of misery and unhappiness. Death of a loved one tops the list of the most difficult traumas to get over and start again. Yet, endless other events bring us to the need for a new normal—a failed marriage, a personal failure, financial ruin, losing one’s job, empty nest when children leave, moving to a new location, or health issues.
Any of these may present us with new limitations. Some of our veterans who come home that have lost a limb inspire me. Their previous normal life in America is forever gone. Yet, we see stories of so many who refuse to give in to their challenges and create a new normal. Their mobility changes from two legs and two feet, to a prosthetic leg or a wheel chair. They adjust and grow stronger.
The need, the time, or the desire for new normal doesn’t always result from a tragedy. It may mean that one phase of life has ended and God wants to bring us to a new phase. Moses lived as a sheep herder with his wife and children in Midian, but the Lord called him to a new phase. Peter, James, John, and Andrew left their career as fishermen. Several factors are keys in transitioning into any new beginning. First, we must accept that we are leaving what we have called normal. Through Isaiah, the Lord told Israel, Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! (Isa.43:18). Second, it will always move us out of our comfort zone. At some point in life, most people reach a comfort zone. It might not consist of all they desired in life, but they know what to expect and feel safe. However, God may be stretching our faith. We can rest assured that the Lord will provide all we need for a change. A new normal gives the opportunity to grow in Christ.
Third, we must adapt and adjust. Moses lived isolated for 40 years in the desert caring for his herds but at the age of eighty, he found himself back in the capital city of Egypt, and then pastoring hundreds of thousands of people. His new normal required more adjustment than any of us could imagine. My family’s most extreme adjustments came when we moved from America to Africa—no stocked grocery stores, so we adapted and grew much of our food; with no email available, we wrote lots of letters; no office supply stores, so we drove three days to South Africa twice a year and stocked up. We faced many more challenges, but this shows the way we had to adapt and adjust. We must also accept our unchangeable limitations and adjust to new means and God’s grace. I implored the Lord three times that it might leave me. And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness” (2Co 12:8, 9).
Life itself is constantly changing. Note a warning. Today the Church is facing the challenge to change its doctrine and adjust to the false teaching of the world yet God and the truth of His Word never changes. The methods of presenting the Gospel must often adapt to the changing culture, but not the message of sin and salvation through Christ. It is a bit humorous and sad to see a large tent pitched in a field with a sign inviting people to a revival crusade when the temperature is 100 degrees in the shade. The message may be the same, but the method requires a new normal. We must ground any new normal in the Word of God.
Arriving at a point where we face a new normal, either from tragedy or by God’s design, does not mean life is over, rather it brings new purpose, new strength, and new joy. Even those who have fallen into a sinful life, a new normal with God is possible no matter how spiritually low you have gone. God has a plan for every person’s life—a new normal if we will accept it. ‘For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the LORD (Jer 29:11).
Sustaining Word for the Week: Maybe it is God’s time for you to move to a new normal.