Stick and stone can break my bones, but words . . . Well! The old nursery rhyme telling us that words can never hurt us is a nice thought, but it just ain’t true. My mom would always tell me this when I would come home upset after a school bully said something unkind. The reality is that words can hurt and can hurt a whole lot. Sticks and stones may leave bruises and cuts, but they will heal; cruel words can leave wounds that hurt for a lifetime. In our current society, words can get you fired from your job, can get you sued, and even get you arrested. Let’s face it, words are powerful. Just note all the recent media coverage coming out of the sport’s world—all over words.
I was warned countless times before traveling through Zimbabwe that if anyone called a police officer or military personal a particular Arabic word, he had the legal right to shot you on the spot. I never tried seeing if this was the case. That five letter word carried a lot of power. Today, we euphemize certain offensive words by referring to them as the a-word, or the b-word and I guess all the way down to the z-word.
Jesus considered words powerful and warned about careless words. “But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned” (Mat 12:36, 37). Spoken words are simply sounds caused by air passing through our larynx. Written words are graphics representing those sounds. Whether spoken or written, words are merely symbols that man assigns to identify objects, persons, and to convey beliefs and thoughts. The focus of attention for believers should be the source of words. They do not originate in the mouth, but are a product of one’s heart. Our words are a manifestation of what is inside of us. For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart (Matt 12:34). If you want to gauge your spirituality, listen to yourself talk.
I counselled someone who’s every spoken word was negative. If someone said, “The sun is shining,” there would be a negative response. This had become so normal that he did not even realize he was doing it. A little probing soon revealed a heart full of hurt and resentment. I gave him advice for beginning a process of healing and suggested he consciously search for positive things to say. I am not suggesting positive confession as some advocate. Rather everyone can find something positive to say, if nothing more than, “the weather is nice today.” As we focus on the positive and say positive words, it will influence our outlook on life.
Words greatly impact our self-esteem and self-perception. Three sources of words affect us: the words of other people, the words we tell ourselves, and the words of God. If someone continually tells us that we are worthless, it is easy to begin telling ourselves we are worthless. However, God says we are His workmanship and we have a purpose. In other words, we are not worthless. The question we must answer is whose words are we going to believe—those of other people or those of God’s? You should start telling yourself what God says about you.
Another essential lesson concerning our words is how people perceive us when they hear us talk. Paul says, Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth . . . (Eph 4:29). The word translated unwholesome originally referred to rotten fruit and vegetables. Unfortunately, much of everyday American conversation has denigrated into the realm of vulgarity. In the late 1960’s, I worked as an engineer in a TV station. During the CBS evening news, Walter Cronkite said a curse word. I immediately shut the transmitter off and waited for direction. The general manager called and instructed us when the news broadcast ended, return to the air, and have the announcer on duty give an apology because this had violated the stations standard of excellence policy. Imagine if that was still the standard. Foul language, vulgar humor, and dirty talk should have no place in the life of a Christian. Yet, it is a sad fact that unwholesome (rotten) talk has crept into vocabulary of so many believers.
Paul continues this verse, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear(Eph 4:29). He told the Colossians; Let your speech always be with grace, as though seasoned with salt . . . (Col 4:6). With our words, we can bless or curse people; we can hurt or heal; or we can build up or tear down. We can glorify God by our words or degrade our testimony of Him. Worst of all, we can inflict pain on others that may wound and bring years of hurt. Solomon wrote of the power of words, “The tongue has the power of life and death” (Prov.18:21).
Some of you may be struggling with wounds from someone’s words decades ago. Ask the Holy Spirit to bring complete healing. Only He can heal the deep wounds brought about by the cruel words of others.
SUSTAINING WORD FOR THE WEEK: Listen to your words this week. Are you bringing life or death? Read the written words of God and speak them to yourself.