If a publishing firm asked you to write a history of the past decade, what title would you give it? It should sum up the last ten years into one word or a short phrase. The word that immediately comes to my mind is ‘offended’. I would title it, “The Decade of the Offended”. It seems today we live in a ‘culture of offended people’. My introductory line would read, “I’m offended!” “What are you offended about?” “Everything offends me. Doesn’t it offend you?” “No.” “Then I’m offended that you aren’t offended.”
Media outlets thrive on reporting (or creating) offenses made by an individual that offends someone else. People tend to join together who share the same offense. They feel, since they aren’t alone, this justifies their offense and bitterness. I first wrote about ‘offend’ six years ago after reading that the greeting ‘Hello’ offended a man in Tennessee because it contains the word ‘hell’ and he wanted it removed. I assume we would greet one another ‘O’. But this would just offend somebody else. ‘O’ has several less than flattering meanings in slang language.
The Bible refers to the subject of offense seventy-three times. Jesus gave specific teaching about being offended and offending others. The term in the New Testament is skandalizo from which we get the English words scandal and scandalize. Various Bibles translate it offend, stumble, fall away, or apostatize. It originally specified a wooden stick used for the trigger release holding the bait of an animal trap. By the first century, it referred to any obstacle, literal or figuratively, that caused a person to stumble, lose their footing, and fall.
The Gospel and Biblical truth will always offend certain people. Yet, we must not water down the essentials of the Word, i.e. that which leads to salvation, because it offends someone. On the other hand, Paul tells mature believers free in Christ not to eat meat, to drink wine, or fail to observe certain religious days that offend weaker and less mature believers and cause them to stumble. One person has faith that he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats vegetables only. For if because of food your brother is hurt, you are no longer walking according to love. Do not destroy with your food him for whom Christ died (Rom 14:2, 15). Several churches where I’ve preached served wine instead of grape juice for communion. Discussing this in class, an older student who was a recovered alcoholic said the one sip of wine would cause him to go straight to the liquor store. The communion wine was a stumbling block to this weaker brother; so use nonalcoholic grape juice.
Jesus taught the seriousness of offending. In His teaching about lust, “If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell (Mat 5:29). He warned, but whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea (Mat 18:6). The two concerns for Christians are not to compromise the essentials of the Gospel and second to use wisdom about beliefs that aren’t crucial for salvation.
Other lessons come from the biblical teaching on offense, but particularly relevant in our current times is how do believers respond to offenses directed toward them? First, it is a choice to take offense. We can refuse to embrace someone’s intended offense. Believers don’t have to experience hurt feelings, displeasure, distress, or anger over someone’s actions or words. When we take hold of someone’s attempt to offend us, we are allowing them to control our emotions. This is why the Holy Spirit gives us and grows the fruit of the Spirit—self-control. Second, physiologists say that a lack of self-esteem is a major cause. People who feel inferior are more often offended believing, the offender is trying to show his/her superiority and point out their inferiority.
Believers must constantly ground themselves in God’s Word and the strength of the Holy Spirit. Spiritual maturity comes through practicing who God made us. Mature Christians aren’t easily offended because they know and believe what God says and rely on the strength and guidance of the Holy Spirit. They live out who God created them to be and ignore what others try to intimidate them to be. Solomon said, “A man’s wisdom gives him patience. It is to his glory to overlook an offense” (Prov. 19:11). Overlook means to pass through or over, to go beyond, to be crossed over, or to go away.
We must never forget offense came from a word meaning the trip for a bait trap. Satan is out to trap us in anger, hurt feelings, fear, etc. Embracing an offense quickly leads to sin. Even stopping to consider what offended people are saying can trip the switch and you find yourself trapped.
Sustaining Word for the Week: Abundant peace belongs to those who love Your instruction; nothing makes them stumble (Ps 119:165 Hol).