“I may have been through hell and back, but I am strong enough to walk through hell with a smile on my face and my head held high, I will not let the situation define who I am.” When I heard this statement from Amanda Berry who had been held captive and sexually molested along with two other young ladies for ten years, by Ariel Castro, I thought, “Wow! What a statement!” None of us can even begin imagining what these women endured. Yet, even after living through a nightmare for a decade, she refuses to allow it to define who she is.
This made me stop and reexamine what defines me. We should all occasionally ask ourselves this question. And more important, am I living as God defines me? God has a predetermined design. We are His workmanship (Eph. 2:10). For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb. Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them (Psa 139:13, 16). God created all of us as unique individuals and His will is for us to live accordingly. However, we must first choose to become who God planned for us to be. Free-will gives us this option. But the Pharisees and the lawyers rejected God’s purpose for themselves (Luke 7:30).
We are born with certain traits, and we are influenced by our experiences, culture, and teaching. We live in a sinful and imperfect world in which we encounter both the good and the bad. All of these affect who we are. When we become Christians and receive the Holy Spirit, He begins a process of shaping and reshaping us into the person God designed us to be. He teaches us from the Word, initiates healing, and begins filtering out the bad influences that have distorted God’s intent. This continues as long as we live. We must also be aware that we constantly face pressure from the world to conform ourselves according to its accepted norms. But Paul warns, do not be conformed to this world (Rom. 12:2). The word translated conformed means to be fashioned or molded by external forces. In other words, we must not permit the world to shape us into its pattern.
As we grow in Christ being filled with the Spirit, we learn to depend on Him, and can resist the world’s pressure to shape us into its mold. However, as long as we live, we will still encounter painful situations. That is just the reality of life until Jesus returns. The key is what we do with these wounds and scars. Some of them will always challenge us, but we do not have to let them define us. Hunting, fishing, and woodworking have brought me a lot of painful injuries. Several years ago, I chopped the end of my thumb off cutting a piece of wood. Thankfully, the doctor was able to reattach it leaving only a scar. I love working with wood; it is part of who I am. I could have allowed this experience to prevent me from ever using a power tool again. But I refused and the scar is a reminder that I must exercise extreme caution when operating dangerous tools.
Refusing to let an experience define us may sound easy, but I know it’s not. It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit working in us. All of us have scars, and wounds that are still healing. Some take longer than others do. I still have a few from decades ago that continue challenging me. I have written previously about one that goes back to childhood. If I have worked hard and done all I could possibly do to accomplish something and someone tells me, “You could have done better”, my red-headed temper can arise very quickly. I continue asking the Holy Spirit to bring complete healing.
Jesus went to one particular man lying at the pool of Bethesda who had been ill for thirty-eight years. This location was where the sick, blind, lame, and paralyzed people gathered believing that if an angel of the Lord stirred the waters and they got in first, they would be healed. When Jesus asked this man, if he wanted to get well, rather than answer ‘yes’, he spouted out a list of excuses of why he had not been healed. He had surrendered to his situation. He was allowing the situation of his past to define his future.
Pressures to conform come from many sources. The devil uses our painful experiences trying to mold us into a life of fear and defeat. Others are more subtle as influences that come from our peers, the culture in which we live, and traditions. Too often, these can override who we really are. None of us likes rejection, so we conform or put on a facade. Yet, if God has a definition of who we are to be, then would we not be happier and more successful if we grant the Holy Spirit control of our life in order to shape and reshape us into His design?
Paul gives the means of preventing the external world from shaping us. Be transformed by the renewing of your mind (Rom 12:2). The word transformed is the word metamorphoses—the process a caterpillar undergoes in becoming a beautiful butterfly. For us it is internal transformation or metamorphous of our minds. Amanda has taken the first step to becoming the person she is—she has chosen not to let a horrible situation define her. For us, it is the same—a choice allowing God to transform you into the person He designed you to be. Beneath all the scares and wounds is a beautiful spiritual butterfly.
SUSTAINING WORD FOR THE WEEK: What define you? Is it a painful situation or pressures from the world? God has a perfect design. Yield to Him so He can heal, reshape, and transform you according to His definition. You will have a beautiful life.